“Hi Donna, how are you? How are the kids…the husband?”
I always got stuck when people asked about my husband. If the question was coming from an old friend, I was never sure if they were asking about the first or second husband. After two failed marriages when asked the dreaded question, “How’s your husband?” it became a longer and more embarrassing story.
As far as I can remember, I’ve always suffered from low self-esteem. My value and self-worth was fulfilled through relationships. From the age of 13, with my very first puppy love to my second divorce at the age of 36, I NEVER knew what it was like to NOT be in a relationship. I had never experienced what it was like to just be alone, to experience the joy and the very essence of ME. I was never the type to have a multitude of men, but I always had to have one. My relationships would last years. The fear of being alone kept me in situations that weren’t ideal. When in a relationship my whole world revolved around my mate. I had no identity. I was lost in the relationship and I was lost in them.
I married my first husband at the tender age of 22. Looking back, I see all the signs why the marriage failed. I don’t have many memories from that marriage other than the constant arguing. We were both too young, but the blessings in that marriage came by way of my two beautiful daughters.
Fast forward to my second marriage. “You never make the connection. You’re so stupid. Continue reading
Donata 