Posts Tagged ‘Physical Abuse’

Give the gift…

GIVE the gift of… 10 day campaign

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We are so excited to be launching this campaign… Give the gift of… how can you make an impact on a young one’s life? Which gift would you want them to take away with your donation? Empowerment, Freedom, Peace? Those are just a few things that our young women can take away by reading DONATA: In the Mind of a Victim.

Here is what one reader wrote after reading the book… “I commend Donata for sharing her story. She is candid in the telling of her story and the reader will be deeply affected. I admire her courage for ending her abusive marriage and I applaud her for explaining her reasons for staying so many years under the thumb of such violence. With her unabridged candor she opens the door to a sensitive, ignored and misunderstood topic.

Not only does Donata share her experience with domestic violence but she gives signs for women to be aware of a potential abuser. Statistics are noted leaving you staggered. She also includes several organizations providing aid.

This is a must read for females of all ages, learn the signals, educate yourself on the myriad of ways abuse reveals itself. Donata discusses the phases of abuse, again doling out preventative information so measures can be taken and awareness is commonplace. This is not only a story of a woman’s survival but a handbook of sorts for empowerment.

The greatest gift we can give females is the gift of knowledge, empowerment and self esteem. The value of self worth is essential in the fight against domestic violence.

After I read Donata’s story it occurred to me society continually asks the ignorant question of Why didn’t she leave? Why does/did she stay? INSTEAD society should be asking the ABUSER Why did you hit her? How could you do that to a woman? Why didn’t you get help? Why? The questions need to be answered AND directed to the ABUSER NOT THE VICTIM/SURVIVOR.

I am a survivor, albeit not anywhere on the level of Donata’s situation. I was four months pregnant when I experienced my FIRST AND LAST taste of domestic violence. I walked away immediately and never returned, vowing to never be treated as such in this lifetime again. No one knew of my situation, not surprising since society assumes all is well if signs aren’t obvious, stereotypes aren’t fed. What goes on behind closed doors is unknown until it escalates to the point of recognition.

Once again, this is a must read, this could save a life, be the life ring someone desperately needs, this could be the answer the woman behind unsuspecting closed doors needs. Donata’s story could end the torture a 16 year old girl is facing but doesn’t know where or who to turn to due to fear or embarrassment. Highly highly recommend this informative and inspiring story depicting the facts and truth of domestic violence from a woman who survived seven years of hell, desperate to piece together her life and that of her son. A brutally honest voice from the mind of a victim turned survivor.” ~Melinda.

One out of 3 teens will be, have been or are currently in an abusive relationship. Help us to share this message with your donation. Our campaign is running for 10 days on Kickstarter. The minimum is $5 to donate. Give the gift of…

More about the author Donata Joseph.

Thank you for being a part of this great cause. Please share with others. ENDS DECEMBER 23RD 7am est.


The wait is over…

The wait is over…. order your book today, click here. Buy it, gift it, share it. It’s a message for all.

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This story is a reminder of how someone can snap when there is too much tension. There are always signs before something like this happens. In this case according to the news “West BabylonHigh School football star had never displayed any violent tendencies,” but according to other family members, “It wasn’t a healthy thing that was going on,” Angela U. Perkins, 32, of Round Rock, Texas, said of the relationship between Belcher and the cousin she knew as “Kasi.”…

Could there have been domestic abuse that was going on in this relationship, in the home behind closed doors? No way to know now. Do you know the signs to look for, for yourself or a loved one?

Jovan Belcher’s relationship with Perkins was strained, her relatives say

Kansas City Chiefs shootings: No easy answers as team grapples with emotions


7 Tips to Help Your Loved One in an Abusive Relationship

Local expert talks domestic violence help resource

It can happen to anyone. Learn the signs, educate yourself and your loved ones. Life is too short to end this way.

-Donata Joseph #adhdfdn

Domestic Violence Awareness Month

1 in 4 women have been, will be or are currently in an abusive relationship. Is it you, your daughter, granddaughter, niece, mom…. even your son. Yes, even men are in abusive relationships. Some men don’t hit back when their girlfriend or wife beat them. Would you be able to recognize the signs if it was happening to a loved one? It’s more alarming for teens, 1 in 3 will experience being in an abusive relationship. It’s time to talk more to our younger ones about relationships. Yes it may seem they’re to young but if we don’t talk about it, they will learn from someone else…. let it be you.

Some cues that might indicate an abusive relationship might include:

  • Abuse alcohol or other drugs.
  • Have a history of trouble with the law, get into fights, or break and destroy property.
  • Don’t work or go to school.
  • Blame you for how they treat you, or for anything bad that happens.
  • Abuse siblings, other family members, children or pets.
  • Put down people, including your family and friends, or call them names.
  • Are always angry at someone or something.
  • Try to isolate you and control whom you see or where you go.
  • Nag you or force you to be sexual when you don’t want to be.
  • Cheat on you or have lots of partners.
  • Are physically rough with you (push, shove, pull, yank, squeeze, restrain).
  • Take your money or take advantage of you in other ways.
  • Accuse you of flirting or “coming on” to others or accuse you of cheating on them.
  • Don’t listen to you or show interest in your opinions or feelings. . .things always have to be done their way.
  • Ignore you, give you the silent treatment, or hang up on you.
  • Lie to you, don’t show up for dates, maybe even disappear for days.
  • Make vulgar comments about others in your presence
  • Blame all arguments and problems on you.
  • Tell you how to dress or act.
  • Threaten to kill themselves if you break up with them, or tell you that they cannot live without you.
  • Experience extreme mood swings. . .tell you you’re the greatest one minute and rip you apart the next minute.
  • Tell you to shut up or tell you you’re dumb, stupid, fat, or call you some other name (directly or indirectly).
  • Compare you to former partners.

Some other cues that might indicate an abusive relationship might include:

  • You feel afraid to break up with them.
  • You feel tied down, feel like you have to check-in.
  • You feel afraid to make decisions or bring up certain subjects so that the other person won’t get mad.
  • You tell yourself that if you just try harder and love your partner enough that everything will be just fine.
  • You find yourself crying a lot, being depressed or unhappy.
  • You find yourself worrying and obsessing about how to please your partner and keep them happy.
  • You find the physical or emotional abuse getting worse over time.

Adapted from the Domestic Abuse Project (

A Welcome Steady Spotlight on Teen Dating Violence

Teens and Dating Violence

Dating Violence Statistics



~ Donata Joseph



It takes ONE time!

These stories that I’m hearing or reading are heartbreaking. Ladies, we need to empower ourselves to know that we are worth more than the relationships we allow ourselves to be in. Being with a partner that verbally, physically or emotionally abuses you is NOT acceptable. I understand we make excuses for our partners and that’s what keeps us in these relationships but who are we truly hurting, them or ourselves… or worse, our children. Some of us don’t even realize how bad our situation is until it’s too late, like one story you will read below. Some of us feel that our partner will change or God will change them – what if that doesn’t happen then what?

I recently heard a story of a woman where her mate beat her; she didn’t leave but allowed herself to believe that God forgave him. I can’t judge if God did or didn’t but when it happens again, because it will, what excuse will you use to comfort yourself then. People that abuse people don’t wake up one day and stop; they have to go through a process either counseling, anger management, church…Etc. They have to realize and accept that what they are doing is wrong and WANT to change. Regardless of the method, there is a process that must take place. We automatically assume that they changed because they asked for forgiveness, promise that they will never do it again, cry, give flowers and are the sweetest person for a few days…. on the other hand we are so blind we don’t realize that’s just another part of the domestic violence cycle called the honeymoon phase. Trust me; I know we think FINALLY it won’t happen again. WRONG, the next thing that makes them snap all hell breaks loose and we are the punching bags again… this time the question is         WILL WE SURVIVE

Here is a story I read today – what breaks my heart is where she tweeted “Wouldn’t be so bad if he ain’t tried 3 times before, But I’m Gods Child ain’t never scared” – that’s the  same day he killed her. God can only do so much, he gives us the tools to make wise chooses. We can’t stand in front of a bus and not expect to get killed. I’m not in any way putting this young girl down or saying she deserved this by any means. My point is the God issue, it’s like the other story where she said God forgave her boyfriend, that’s great STILL don’t continue to stay in harm’s way to wait for God to have to forgive him again after another violent attack. We use God to make excuses for them did it ever occur that maybe God didn’t choose that person for us. Let’s think of it that way and allow ourselves to break free from these violent relationships.

If a guy can threaten to kill you TRUST that he probably will. Forget that he said it 100 times before, it takes him to SNAP ONE TIME and you’re done. Some make it out alive some don’t. Don’t take that chance, no relationship is worth it…                       RIP to another DV victim: Woman found murdered 2 days after calling 911 for help









~Donata Joseph #adhdfdn #E3Yourself

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